If you’re faced with an angry child, it can be very frustrating, and your frustration can have an impact on how the encounter with your child unfolds. It is hard for any parent to deal with this type of situation, and every child responds differently to various methods of coping with their anger.
The most important thing, above all, is to know that the problem is fixable given the right tools. Take a look at these seven tips for calming an angry child to see what may work for you and your kiddo.
Keep Your Voice Level Low
Everyone seems to have this button built-in that the louder the other person gets, the louder you want to get. Avoid that escalation by trying to keep your voice level low. It forces your child to listen harder and keeps the both of you from getting more worked up. If you stay calm and don’t let your voice pitch or volume go above a normal speaking tone, it will help bring the tension level down.
Don’t Allow Yourself to React
Aside from your voice level, the other number one way for you to make your child angrier is to react to their behavior. It’s natural, we know, but again, as with the volume of your voice, you have to remember not to allow yourself to react. It will only escalate the situation. It would be best if you remained calm and controlled at all times.
As a parent, you quickly learn what makes your child happy, sad, angry, etc. A great tip to dissolve your child’s anger is to use humor in the situation. Whether it is the tone of your voice, saying something you know will make your child laugh, or even your body language. Though some things you do may further frustrate your child, give it a try. It helps to distract them, sometimes just long enough for them to calm down.
Acknowledge Your Child’s Feelings
As adults, we know how frustrating and degrading it can be when someone doesn’t acknowledge us. If you recognize your child’s feelings, it lets them know it’s okay to feel that way and it’s okay to express themselves and gives them a sense of self-worth. What needs to be stressed is that along with those feelings comes responsibility. They are responsible for not lashing out at others because of their emotions.
The method of redirecting works exceptionally well for younger children and is widely used in classroom settings to diffuse a situation. To turn your angry child, find something more constructive and away from wherever, whatever, or whoever has triggered the anger. Generally, taking the child out of their situation will immediately ease tension and allow them to calm down.
Take a Break
If removing them and speaking in low tones does not work, you can always take a break. Since you are an authority figure in your child’s life, removing yourself from your child’s personal space may give them the opportunity they need to quiet their minds. It would be advised to remove any siblings, as any of their behavior could trigger an escalation too.
Let Your Child Know You Love Them
This may seem like you are giving in, but letting your child know you love them helps validate their feelings and importance in your life. You don’t ever want to encourage the behavior that accompanies their anger, only that you love them and respect how they feel. Especially if you feel the need to take a break, a simple “I love you, and I’ll be over here when you’re ready to talk” can make a difference.
So, when you’re dealing with an angry child, follow the steps provided for you to find what works best for your child in that situation.
Remember, they are just tiny adults who want the same things you do, but without the capability to express it the way you would like them to.
Do you have any tips for how you manage when your child is angry? Share them with us in the comments below.